Sunday, April 29, 2012

The Perspective I: Questionnaire #1

ACCOMPLISHING A MAJOR LIFE GOAL: The Mindset, the Motivation that is required, the Change in Self-Iamge
1.What major goal are you currently trying to achieve? (or recently achieved?)
2. What hardships have you faced in pursuing your major goal and how have you been able to stay motivated?
3. How long have you been pursuing this goal?
4. What makes you feel most proud about accomplishing this particular goal?
5. How has your self-image changed throughout this process ?
  1. A major goal I achieved is becoming a school psychologist (getting my masters and credential).
2. Some of the hardships I faced throughout the way included juggling being a sleep deprived mother (Mary was 6 months old when I started grad school and was a terrible sleeper). Grad school classes were in the afternoon and evening so it was initially very hard and I didn't think I could make it. I stayed motivated by my friendships and my family. I would bring Mary to my parents the two days a week I had classes and they would play with her until Ed (my husband) picked her up after work. I also met a wonderful woman, Briana, and we became best friends. Also, my professors were very supportive. We had a cohort (all the students went to all the same classes for all 3 years) and that sense of community and friendship was very motivating.
Another hardship was becoming separated from my husband. I left him in my first year of grad school but we actually got back together in my third year. Again, I stayed motivated with the support of my family and friends. Other hardships included the extreme amount of work, finding internships and job opportunities and juggling those responsibilities with trying to still have a life. I stayed motivated throughout it all because I really like being a school psychologist. I love making sure children are doing the best they can in school and are happy and feel connected. Even though there are hard days and difficult students, it's the connections that I make with kids that keep me motivated. Also, I've met so many wonderful adults in the schools I have worked in and those connections keep me motivated when work gets hard.
3. I pursued my goal of becoming a school psychologist for 3 years.
4. I feel proud because I found a career that I actually like. I worked my butt off in school and my grad school program provided me with the knowledge I need to do my job. I am proud that I put in the effort because I feel very confident in my job. I also feel most proud about accomplishing this goal because of the hardships/challenges I faced in grad school.
5. My self-image changed because I realized I could withstand hardships and come out on the other end. I wanted to quit grad school a few times and seriously considered quitting when my marriage fell apart. In fact, I was certain that I would drop out but I didn't. I realized that having that identify for myself is something that makes me feel really good. I always just wanted to be a mother and I never really wanted a career but I love the feeling I get of being good at my job. It has also changed my identify because I see myself in a different way- as a smart woman. It makes me less superficial because when I'm having an ugly and fat day, I just push those thoughts aside and go to work. The kids never notice and it takes my mind off of those unhealthy thoughts.
1. What major goal are you currently trying to achieve? (or achieved) The biggest goal I have achieved so far is earning my Masters in Social Work. Now that I have earned my MSW the next step for me is to become a licensed social worker. I haven't even begun that process yet but it's next on the agenda! I was lucky enough to get hired at an agency where the supervision I need for licensure is possible, I just need to put everything into place to move towards this goal.
2. What hardships have you faced throughout the way and how have you been able to stay focused?
Graduate school was the hardest thing I have ever done, both emotionally and academically. I never, in a million years, thought that I would take on grad school. High school and college were both a challenge for me academically and so a part of me thought I was crazy for even attempting it but the other part of me wanted so badly to do something "bigger" with my life than what I was doing at the time that I decided to apply.
I have always struggled with anxiety and grad school increased my anixety a million times over and this was by far the biggest hardship I had to overcome in order to be successful. I had to find ways to manage my emotions while getting the work done that I knew I needed to do. Additionally, my graduate program focused a great deal on developing a sense of self-awareness and this was difficult at first--I had a tough time looking at myself and my place in the world, something I had never been forced to do before.
On another note, once I finished school I knew finding a job was going to be tough but I had no idea I would be looking for work for 7 months. I figured that I had a Masters Degree and that was going to be enough for somebody to want to interview me but I was very wrong. Months passed with no word from anyone after sending out resume after resume.
It was a very tough time for me. I eventually got a job waiting tables and I truly believe that I was in the right space and so the universe sent good things my way (as cheesy as it sounds!).
When I was sitting on the couch feeling depressed and thinking that nothing was going to come my way it really didn't. It wasn't until my mind was occupied and I was able to get some comfort in at least having some kind of job that a social work job came my way. At the end of January I was hired by Boulder County to do casework in their child welfare division.
With all of this being said, the last few years since moving to Colorado have been the greatest years of my life thus far. Even with all of the struggles I went through I feel that I am better on this end and I am so proud of all that I have accomplished!
3. How long have you been pursuing your goal? I truly began thinking about what I wanted to do for a "career" in 2006 but it wasn't until 2008 that I started applying for grad school. So I guess it been around four years that I have been working toward becoming a social worker.
4. What makes you feel most proud about accomplishing this particular goal?
Given the challenges I have faced with feeling incompetent academically, I am so proud to have earned a Masters Degree and knowing what it took to earn it.
5. Has your self-image of yourself changed throughout the process, if so, how?
I now know that I can truly do anything I put my mind to. Before I began grad school I questioned my ability and I allowed my anixety to inhibit me from reaching my goals.
I no longer allow for that to happen and it has been the greatest change in my self-image.

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